Me

Elijah, I miss you. Thank you for all the insights on Buddhism, spirituality.. on life.. you taught me many things, made me think of so many things.. Not many people can do that. Thank you for not judging me, for listening to me and chatting with me... You were such a good friend.. I really did want to do so many things with you.. Wanted to travel with you, wanted to cook Indian food with you, wanted to go to Batanes with you. These things are never gonna happen anymore. I'm sorry I didn't realize before today that you died. I'm really gonna miss you, I've already missed you. How is it possible that you and I are never gonna meet? When I read what your live friends say about you,.. wow, you sound so amazing. I wish I could talk to you still and tell you all the stupid things I usually told you. Wish we got to dance to Bhangra together... you would've been so fun to dance with! You know I really enjoyed that thing of you shaking your head to the Bhangra song, and even going on webcam for me and dancing it. Who else would do that?? And just for fun! I remember you gave me a tour of your house on webcam, and I gave you one of mine too, also on webcam. That was really fun, I remember when you even noticed the electric fan blowing the hair around my face.. I remember all the Youtube videos you linked me to.. to be honest, I got bored of many of them... but yeah. Elijah, where are you now? I wish we could talk and laugh still. I never got to show you around Manila,.. never got to eat ginataan and kuchinta with you. And you never had the chance to disgust me with the meat you liked to eat. How about Benny Benassi? You're the one who really got me to like techno and trance.. and now I enjoy it so much. Remember Explosions in the Sky and listening to music at exactly the same time? Haha you found me so strange.. always called me a sap. Remember the hug emoticons we used to give each other? And the kiss ones, the heart ones.. and the roses.. we were just playing around, not serious at all.. but it was so fun.

I really dunno if afterlife exists or if you are still out there, somewhere.. but I really really wish we get to talk again and to meet for the very first time. I feel like I lost something good, I never even got to meet you..

I still have the box you sent the caramels in. I'm never gonna throw it. Thanks for that... you were such a great guy. I'm sorry you weren't very happy at the end.. and you didn't get to do some of the things you dreamed of doing... but you made a lot of people happy. I was reading what your friends say, and you sound like a great person.. how come we never got to really hung out, huh?

It's so crappy, I really don't understand it! I want to be able to talk to you again someday!

Well I'm so glad I met you, even if our friendship was only an online one. I'm so glad that in the last few months, you and I got much closer and I was able to tell you things I don't tell ANYONE. You're the only one who knew that side of me.. and you didn't even judge me for it.

You'll always be somewhere in my heart, Elijah! I will never forget you.